Spend New Year’s with your SELF

Do you feel it? The pressure? The looming energy of ‘yet another year in the books’ and ‘time to set new goals and completely change my life’.  It’s the pressure that every New Year brings wether we like it or not, agree with it or not, or even understand where it comes from. And I think the truth is most of us would like to flush this concept way down the toilet (along with Daylight Savings Time…am I right??) And I want to offer you a solution that may sit better with you, if so.

With so much external pressure we tend to look externally for the answers as well and let’s be honest, society sells us on quick fixes and bandwagon jumping all the time. As the year ends we’re infiltrated from well-meaning friends, advertisements, career goals, and, as we call it in the South, ‘keeping up with the Joneses. The clear expectation is to flip the switch when the ball drops but how often do we end up just dropping the ball? 

While you ponder that ask yourself: How often does the New Year chatter push you to feel the urge to grow, evolve, heal, succeed, and morph into the best version of yourself? And how often do we then rely on what you’re being told is “the way”, “the quick fix” or “how its always been done” by others? How often do we trust the external world and ignore our internal one? How often do we guilt, shame, and judge ourselves when we don’t keep up with those Joneses? And is there a better way?

Turns out our internal world is pretty smart… and attuned to give us everything we need to grow, evolve, heal, succeed, and feel like the best version of ourselves. So if any (or all) of these are on your radar for 2025, I recommend spending some time with your SELF. SELF is what IFS practitioners call our internal guidance…our connection to our soul or higher consciousness… and with some help you can start to tap into that energy and let go of the expectations others have that don’t quite feel right to you. I know what you’re thinking… it’s easier said than done, right? Traumas, conditioning, trapped emotions, and self limiting beliefs can be strong forces to keep us from this connection to SELF. Although that is a true part of the human experience, with a little intention we can start to sort through those limitations and find a calm, connected, and compassionate Self. 

The IFS model also works with PARTS of our self.. and sometimes parts aren’t always on board with the goals we set for ourselves so it’s important to work with these parts to start healing and aligning with our SELF energy. But in a society of quick fixes in the name of progress… what If we don’t need fixing? What if we just need to spend time with these parts of us and let them be seen and heard?

 I want to give you three ways you can feel good about your New Years’ Resolutions and NOT feel pressured to meet any of the external expectations that aren’t in alignment with YOU. 

1. Map out time for SELF and use that time to not focus on the external world.. the societal expectations may not match but because we’re so inundated it’s easy to fall into the trap of what everybody else is doing. In the U.S. the beginning of the year holds an energy of ‘rest and digest’… not ‘hurry and worry’ so its the perfect time to start slowing down, dialing in, and listening to your parts. Not saying that human connection is a no… this is a vital piece of being a human so also be sure to surround yourself with loved ones who will help nurture this connection… find that balance. :) I like to suggest having a comfortable space in your home near a window, a good blanket, maybe some tea, and a journal…definitely a journal. This may feel uncomfortable at first, especially if this is a new practice to you, but stick with it and just start with 5 minutes a day. 

1. Work with an IFS practitioner (if you’re not already) that you trust to guide you into this internal journey. IFS practitioners are extremely skilled in internal worlds and have a plethora of knowledge working from the lens of “parts”. They create a safe space to guide you to diving deeper, connecting, and learning to trust our parts and self. They will help you find the balance of setting goals and the vision you have for yourself… and what may be in the way of getting there. Typically there are parts of us that don’t see eye to eye and aren’t on board with everything we feel aligned with. We take time to collaborate with your vision and match you with the right alignment for your highest good. Speaking of ‘vision’… keep reading for some bonus tips to make this New Year’s even better! 

3. Allow yourself to hear and feel what comes from these parts.. what they have to say is important to truly healing. Now that you are set up in a comfortable spot and a caring guide it’s a good time to check in with your SELF. What we love about IFS is that it allows the hamster wheel in our brains to take a back seat to the wisdom that our body holds. And taking this time to quiet the noise is an opportunity to really, really hear and feel what our parts are needing us to…in a safe container and trusted guidance. It’s taking the time and making the shift from the hustle, busy, doing energy into the relaxed, centered, being energy… again… balance. This is what allows us to connect with our parts and allow them to feel like an important piece of our internal system. 

What’s on your vision board?

Have you ever tried creating a vision board? I’m a huge fan! But I teach it a little differently than what you may have been accustomed to. Here’s what you will need:

• A stack of magazines, a poster board, scissors, and some glue

• A comfortable spot with plenty of space and some quiet time… or maybe some relaxing music

• A connection to SELF. Find a way that works for you to connect with yourself and quiet the noise. I like meditation music and a quick meditation with some calming breathe work before I start! 

Here’s What to do:

Once you are in that calm and connected energy you’ll want to pick one to three areas of your life you’d like to improve this year. Instead of judging and shaming, get to know the parts involved with these areas of you and, if it helps, write what comes up in a journal. Begin to befriend these parts and see what they need from you, see what’s in the way, and help relate any burdens contributing. Once that feels complete and you’ve done a little check in with yourself or maybe even scheduled a session with your coach, you can start to thumb through these magazines and cut-out whatever jumps out to you! It can be pictures, words, or a mix of both. Don’t overthink it.. just go with your instincts! 

I hope you’ll give this a try!

Have a Safe and Happy New Year!

~Coach Krista 

Krista Parks is an Energy Healer, Relationship Coach, and IFS Practitioner. She works with individuals, couples, and groups teaching the true connection to SELF by clearing out traumas, trapped emotions and self limiting beliefs in order to live a more calm, connected, and authentic life.